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Showing posts with label QUOTES. Show all posts
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Surviving As A Single Parent - 7 Simple Suggestions To Make Your Life Easier


1 - Forgive even if you will never be able to Forget -
Let go of grudges you may hold against your child's other parent, who is absent from BOTH of your lives. Holding onto feelings of anger will not change your situation and will probably consume a great deal of your energy - energy you need to devote to creating a positive environment for your child. 
If you dwell on your disappointment with and/or dislike of the father or mother of your child - chances are your child will sense your feelings and suffer in some way from your negative attitude.
2 - Make the most of everything you have -
Even if you do not have a lot of money, you do have your child and your love and your time to give to him or her. Try to remember that monetary wealth and material possessions are not the most important items in your child's life. 
Your love, support and time together mean much more to them. You can have fun for free. Activities like - going for a walk or a bike ride, playing at the park, coloring, painting, singing, or dancing - will thrill your child just as much as spending money to go to an amusement park, an arcade or a toy store.
3 - Be the best parent you can possibly be -
Give as much as you can without setting goals that are unrealistic for one parent to achieve. Don't beat yourself up for what cannot be. 
Do recognize what you can do to create a good life for your child to the best of your abilities.
4 - Develop a network of reliable resources - Families are not biological.
Surround yourself and your child with friends you know and trust - people who care about both of you. "Aunts" and "Uncles" and even "Grandparents," who are not blood-related can be just as beneficial to your child as actual biological family members. 
The "family" you create for your child can provide him or her with the same kind of love and support as a traditional family. They can also help you with your responsibilities as a single parent. Let them play an active role in your child's life. Learn to turn to your "family" when you need a break. 
Nobody should have to go it alone and you will probably be able to be a better parent by relying on your "family" of close friends to support you and your child.
5 - Take responsibility for your life today -
Remember whatever lead you to where you are today, you are responsible for another life - the innocent life of a child, who didn't ask to be born. 
Your child is not responsible for the experiences or events that made you become a single parent. Your child is completely dependent upon you through no choice of their own. 
Don't let them down or hold them accountable for your actions (or the actions of their absent parent). They are powerless and vulnerable to the possibly less-than-ideal consequences they face as the child of a single parent. Your role and influence in their life is paramount to their chances of becoming a happy, productive, successful adult. They need you more than their words will ever tell.
6 - Set up daily rituals and regular routines -
Your child needs stability and security. 
One way to provide this is by developing a daily routine. Simple things like - going to the park every Sunday afternoon, eating dinner together each night, sharing a treat before nap time or reading a book together before bed every night, will become activities that your child looks forward to and can count on to occur with regularity.
7 - Be consistent and dependable -
Create realistic rules and a standard of discipline that you stick to all the time. 
If you're consistent with your child, he or she will learn what is acceptable behavior and what is not. They will also learn what you expect from them and what they can expect from you. 
If you're dependable, they will know that they can always count on you to help them with their homework, be there for dinner or tuck them in bed at night. 
They have to be able to depend on you. You're the most important person in their life. 
Try to remember that no matter how tired you are at the end of the day or how frustrated you may become when they're fussy - They need you to be there for them. 
You should cherish every moment with your child - they are the best blessings on earth.

Top 70 Things To Always Remember In Life


1 To the world you might be one person, but to one person you might be the world.
2 Your presence is a present to the world.
3 You are unique and one of a kind.
4 Your life can be what you want it to be.
5 Take the days just one at a time.
6 Count your blessings, not your troubles.
7 You will make it through whatever comes along.
8 Within you are so many answers.
9 Do not put limits on yourself.
10 Decisions are too important to leave to chance.
11 Reach for your peak, your goal and your prize.
12 Nothing wastes more energy than worrying.
13 The longer one carries a problem the heavier it gets.
14 Do not take things too seriously.
15 Live a life of serenity, not a life of regrets.
16 Remember that a little love goes a long way. Remember that a lot ... goes forever.
17 Remember that friendship is a wise investment.
18 Life's treasure are people together.
19 Realize that it is never too late.
20 Do ordinary things in an extraordinary way.
21 Have hearth and hope and happiness.
22 Life is 10% of what happens to you, and 90% of how you respond to it.
23 Don't be afraid to learn. Knowledge is weightless, a treasure you can always carry easily.
24 Take the time to wish upon a star.
25 Words are windows to the heart.
26 You are richer today if you have laughed, given or forgiven.
27 I don't have to attend every argument I'm invited to.
28 Life is like an onion; you peel off one layer at a time and sometimes you weep.
29 Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.
30 A good example is the best sermon.
31 No one is easier to deceive than oneself.
32 The greatest fault of all is to be conscious of none.
33 Love is understanding, acceptance, and tenderness. If it tries to strangle and possess, it is not love.
34 The journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step.
35 The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power within us.
36 Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one so that when we finally meet the right person, we will know how to be grateful for that gift.
37 When the door of happiness closes, another opens, but often times we look so long at the closed door that we don't see the one which has been opened for us.
38 The best kind of friend is the kind you can sit on a porch and swing with, never say a word, and then walk away feeling like it was the best conversation you've ever had.
39 It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives.
40 Dream what you want to dream; go where you want to go; be what you want to be, because you have only one life and one chance to do all the things you want to do.
41 Always put yourself in others' shoes. If you feel that it hurts you, it probably hurts the other person, too.
42 The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way.
43 When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling.
44 Live your life so that when you die, you're the one who is smiling and everyone around you is crying.
45 Anger is a condition in which the tongue works faster than the mind.
46 You can't change the past, but you can ruin the present by worrying over the future.
47 Love ......and you shall be loved.
48 All people smile in the same language.
49 A hug is a great gift..one size fits all. It can be given for any occasion and it's easy to exchange.
50 Everyone needs to be loved...especially when they do not deserve it.
51 The real measure of a man's wealth is what he has invested in love.
52 Everything has beauty but not everyone sees it.
53 It's important for parents to live the same things they teach.
54 If you fill your heart with regrets of yesterday and the worries of tomorrow, you have no today to be thankful for.
55 Happy memories never wear out.... relive them as often as you want.
56 Home is the place where we grumble the most, but are often treated the best.
57 The choice you make today will usually affect tomorrow.
58 Take time to laugh for it is the music of the soul.
59 If anyone speaks badly of you, live so none will believe it.
60 Patience is the ability to idle your motor when you feel like stripping your gears.
61 Love is strengthened by working through conflicts together.
62 The best thing parents can do for their children is to love each other.
63 Harsh words break no bones but they do break hearts.
64 To get out of a difficulty, one usually must go through it.
65 We take for granted the things that we should be giving thanks for.
66 Love is the only thing that can be divided without being diminished.
67 Happiness is enhanced by others but does not depend upon others.
68 For every minute you are angry with someone, you lose 60 seconds of happiness that you can never get back.
69 Do what you can, for who you can, with what you have, and where you are.
70 AND DO NOT EVER FORGET .... FOR EVEN A DAY HOW VERY SPECIAL YOU ARE !

Top 7 Best Tips To Become A Good Stepmother


Becoming a stepmother can undoubtedly be one of the most challenging, yet rewarding, experiences in a woman's life. 
Every family's circumstances are certainly different in some ways. There are numerous uncontrollable factors, which will inevitably effect your relationship with your stepchildren, like: whether the children have a living biological mother; whether they have any contact with their biological mother; how long ago and why their biological parents are no longer together; etc... 

Consider the following seven suggestions to help you be the best stepmom you can be... 
1) Remember that they are not YOUR children. You do not automatically become equal to their father in any way - particularly when it comes to discipline, enforcing rules etc... Discuss your role in their lives with their father and then with them. Let him tell them how he expects them to interact with you. (For example: Your husband may say that his children must listen to you just the same as they listen to him... or He may decide that he is the still the primary care-giver, law-maker, rule-enforcer...) Make sure he is fair to you and them, so you do not become the instant "enemy." 

2) Make time for your stepchildren. Show an interest in their daily lives - how they're doing in school, what they do after school, their hobbies at home, etc... Get involved with their social life, sporting events, extracurricular activities IF they want you to. Do not try too hard or push yourself into their life. And definitely do not pry into their business. 

3) Do not break their trust in you. Develop an open line of communication by talking to them and respecting their wishes. If they ask you not to tell their father something they've shared with you, DO NOT betray their confidence by running to him. (Unless of course, it is something critical that he must know and then ask him not to tell the kids that you were the person who told him...) 

4) Be yourself. Develop a totally unique relationship with your stepchildren - in a way that does not try imitate their mother. Do not try to be like her or to replace her. 

5) Never talk badly about the children's mother in front of them. Try to establish some level of communication with her if she is still involved in their life. It can help the kids tremendously if you and their mother get along. And it can hurt them deeply if you don't. 

6) Have patience. Do not expect miracles to occur overnight. This is not an "instant" happy family... But if you try to make the transition a pleasant one and create an positive living environment, time will do the rest. 
7) Remember that you are the "outsider." They did not choose you. Their father did. Their standards are probably extremely rigid. You are the adult. They are children and you have to earn their love and respect.

Top 3 Best Ways To Communicate With Your Child


Although many parents become frustrated as they try to maintain an open line of communication between themselves and their children, regardless of age, there are three quite simple ways to attempt to achieve this goal effectively.
1 Talk to your kids. Every day. More than once a day. Every morning before school. Every afternoon after school. Every evening (preferably as you sit down TOGETHER at the dinner table). Every night before they go to bed (preferably as you ARE THE PERSON who tucks them in, says goodnight, sees them get in bed in their pajamas etc...)

2 Make time for your children. Not just the above mentioned time to talk - but actual time WITH them. Go to their soccer games, school events, and other extracurricular activities. And DO NOT just show up at their games half-way through and leave before they end. Take them (and their friends) to their after-school activities. Talk to them (and their friends on the way there and on the way back). Stay for the whole game, talk to your children after the game is over about the game, their friends, their coaches, the involved people....

3 Be honest with your kids. Children can spot a liar a mile away. They relate and respond to HONESTY. They rely on you to tell them the truth. If you do not deliver this basic necessity, how can you expect them to reciprocate? If you HAVE to work late and will not be able to attend their game, be at dinner, help them with their homework etc... TELL THEM WHY you have to work late.

Top 5 Effective Ways To Stay In Touch With Your Child


Once your little boy/girl goes off to school, you may find that your "special talks" occur less frequently... You may become disheartened by the mere fact that your child now has new friends to share his daily stories with... To prevent yourself from losing your mind and losing touch with your child when he/she goes to school full-time, try the following five exercises in communication. 

1) Make it a point to ask your child about his/her day as soon as you see him/her after school. (Do not accept a "nothing" response - rephrase your question as many times as needed to get a "real" response: for example: What did you learn today? or What was the best part of your day today?) 

2) Make it a priority to ask your child what they brought home in their backpack each day. (Do not pry too much but do make it your business to know what they have in their backpack every day...) 

3) Get involved with your child's homework. Even if they're only in kindergarten or first grade, their teacher probably will send some type of homework home at least once a week, keep an eye out for this and then be an active participant in the completion of any homework. 

4) Become a volunteer at your child's school. Almost every school, whether public or private, needs help - parent volunteers in many areas. Donate your time, your expertise, your knowledge, your love and compassion for children.... 

5) If you cannot volunteer your time and get to know your child's classmates, give something of yourself in some other way that will keep you involved in your child's life. Any type of effort/interaction on your part with their teacher will bring satisfaction and reward to you and your child. The bottom line is simple. Just because your child is now in school seven or eight hours a day - does not mean he/she does not STILL need you and/or that you cannot continue to be an active part of their daily life.

What I've Learned in life


You cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.
No matter how much I care, some people just don't care back.
It takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.
It's not what you have - it's who you have in your life that counts.
You can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.
It's taken me a long time to become the person I want to be. You should always leave loved ones with loving words - It may be the last time you see them.
The people you care about most in life are taken from you MUCH too soon...
We are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel. Either you control your attitude or it controls you.
Credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.
Our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for what we do.
Maturity has more to do with experiences you've had and what you've learned from them- and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.
You should never tell a child their dreams are unlikely or outlandish- nothing is more humiliating and what a tragedy it would be if they believed it.
Even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you - you will find the strength to help.
Heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done - regardless of the consequences.
No matter how bad your heart is broken - the world does not stop for your grief.
Your family won't always be there for you. It may seem funny, but people who aren't related to you- can take care of you and love you and teach you to trust people again. Families are not always biological.

How To Become A Work At Home Mom


1 - Start A Day care Service In Your Home
Care for other working parent's children in your home. Talk to friends, family and other parents you know to find prospective customers. Make a list of services you will provide (meals, diapers, activities, etc.) and estimate how much money you will spend to provide these items. Consider the value of your time and your services to determine an hourly or weekly rate to charge customers. Discuss your ideas with people who are experienced childcare professionals. They may provide insight to important issues and offer helpful advice.
Benefits: Spend every day with your child. Earn some extra money without leaving your home.
Necessities: Honest love of children. Patience. Time management and organizational skills. Adequate space and hazard free home.
Considerations: State laws vary, but certifications, approvals, inspections, and licenses are required for some home childcare providers. Check out the rules in your state, as well as possible county or local government regulations.
Drawbacks: Lack of quiet time. Less individual interaction with your own child.
2 - Start A Word-Processing/Data-Entry Service
Brush up on your typing skills and put that computer to use. Talk to friends, family or local business people to get leads to clients, who may be in need of this type of service. Decide what types of documents you will offer to prepare for customers (newsletters, resumes, business cards, legal documents, menus, medical transcriptions etc.) Research prices and options available at other businesses that provide similar services. Name your new company. Create sample flyers of your work and distribute at offices, malls, hospitals, restaurants and any other place that could use your services. Advertise for free by word of mouth. Or market your services with advertisements in local newspapers, business journals, radio, and public television networks.
Benefits: Make your own hours. Potential to earn fairly good profit depending on your time commitment.
Necessities: Good computer. Knowledge of word-processing programs, like Microsoft Windows or Word Perfect. Area in your home for your office (not the living room with the television and your toddler to divert your attention).
Considerations: Set up contracts with your customers that will clarify your services, fees, and payment terms. Check with a lawyer to determine best way for you to develop a contract that will ensure you get paid for your work.
Drawbacks: Establishing yourself in business will require some start-up money to advertise and attract initial customers. Ability to devote certain days/hours to working in your office at home without distractions.
3 - Become An Affiliate Salesperson for Health Products, Lingerie, Handmade Baskets or Similar Items
If you're interested in cosmetics, consider companies, like Avon or Mary Kay. If healthy living is your priority, seek opportunities with businesses that specialize in nutrition products, vitamins, holistic medicine, or health supplements. Whether you like Tupperware, books or toys, there's various options to work from home as an independent distributor, telecommuting representative or sales associate with a manufacturer, who makes something you know about, believe in or want to learn about.
Benefits: Work independently in already established business. Choose your hours and level of commitment that will determine your income.
Necessities: Knowledge of whatever you're selling. Some sales experience or a desire to learn how to sell. Ability to talk to people you don't know and captivate their interest in the product you're promoting.
Considerations: Make sure you understand terms of manufacturer's contract, like your commission, initial investment, length of contract. It's worth having a lawyer look over a document before you sign it. Ask questions before you commit to anything.
Drawbacks: No guaranteed income. Your earnings depend on your sales.
4 - Start A Tutoring Service Or Offer Private Lessons
Some parents don't have time or energy to help their children with homework. If you like working with kids and have the ability and knowledge to assist students with a particular subject, consider offering to tutor kids afterschool or on weekends in your home. If the thought of homework still gives you a headache, think about what talents you have that you could share with other people. Some parents seek one-on-one instruction for their kids that schools seldom offer in regular classes. Consider some popular subject areas, like piano lessons (or any musical instrument instruction), dance classes, art training, or writing workshops.
Benefits: Personal reward for providing others with knowledge and skills that are meaningful to you. Set your own schedule.
Necessities: Knowledge of subject matter. Ability to teach what you know to someone else in a way that is understandable, interesting and professional.
Considerations: Responsibility for other people's children while they're in your home. Credentials to prove your qualifications, if ever questioned.
Drawbacks: Patience and true passion for what you're teaching. Potential for people to cancel at last minute or not show up at all for scheduled lesson, which could negatively effect your income.
5 - Start A Sewing Business
If you have a flair for fixing tears, mending seams, altering outfits or making custom clothing, dig that old sewing machine out of the attic, figure out how to get it running again, thread a needle, push some pins, and practice stitching something. If you find out it still fits your fashion sense. If you feel confident and capable after a few crash courses, consider contacting local clothing stores, who may keep lists of referrals for their customers in need of alterations. Look for other places to publicize your new business pursuit, like local drycleaners, Laundromats, schools, wedding shops, or craft stores. Once you get a few satisfied customers, you can almost count on word-of-mouth to carry your name to more people in need of sewing services.
Benefits: Decide how much work you want to do and when you want to do it. Sewing projects can be done in phases, for example, maybe you have an hour to make some minor alterations, while your children are sleeping or 15 minutes to finish fixing a tear, while you're watching the evening news.
Necessities: Professional Seamstress skills. A good sewing machine. Materials, like thread, needles, pins etc.
Considerations: Must be able to provide the professional services that customers are paying for and deliver on your promises in a timely fashion.
Drawbacks: Potential for problems with sewing machine that you cannot fix. Ability to deal with demanding people, like customers who can afford custom tailored clothing and expect absolute perfection.
6 - Start Selling Your Homemade Arts And Crafts
If you have a knack for creating arts and crafts, like dried flower wreaths, pottery, silk flower arrangements, wooden furniture, calligraphy prints, paintings, or stylish jewelry, turn your home-based hobby into profit in your pocket. Test the market before you make 100 beaded necklaces or build up a stockpile of silk flowers for your future business. Go to craft fairs, art shops, flea markets, and other places that sell products similar to your specialty. Check out the competition - what's hot - what's not - prices and talk to people. If you feel confident that your creation is a winner, rent a stand at a craft show to see if it sells. After exploring your market, you will be able to decide how to continue or what to change to succeed at selling your homemade arts and crafts creations.
Benefits: Get paid for doing something you enjoy and decide when you want to work.
Necessities: Focus and commitment to create your products with a personal touch and perfection in bulk quantity. Desire to sell whatever you make.
Considerations: Loss of credibility with customers, if claims about your custom products fail to be completely factual.
Drawbacks: No guaranteed income. Self-motivation to make and sell your special arts and crafts.
7 - Start An Errand Service
There's plenty of people from busy professionals and bachelors to single parents and senior citizens, who don't have time or transportation to pick up prescriptions, drop off dry cleaning, shop for groceries or other goods. If you don't mind shuttling your kids from store to store, shopping from someone else's list or waiting in line to place an order or pay for a purchase, consider offering to complete these types of errands for other people. Contact friends, family, local businesses, or senior centers, to find people, who fit the profile of someone who would be benefit from this service. If you get a few satisfied customers, word-of-mouth should pave a path to other people, who would pay you to run their errands.
Benefits: Make your own hours and choose your customers.
Necessities: Reliable vehicle. Knowledge of geographic area, Patience and ability to pay attention to details and each customer's specific desires and directions.
Considerations: Automobile insurance. Responsibility for someone else's valuable personal goods. Whether it's their clothing or their medicine, they're trusting you to treat it like it was your own priceless possession. (Don't hang the freshly dry-cleaned $200 suit in the back seat next to your two year-old, who's drinking his little cup of grape juice)
Drawbacks: Ability to devise efficient, economical plan to deliver services to customers. Kids can get bored quick in the car and kids can run away and wreak havoc in stores. (But depending on the age of your children - they can offer valuable assistance and learn something by helping you find items on your shopping list at some stores.)

How To Entertain A Child While Working From A Home Office


There is no doubt that the benefits of being a work-at-home parent outweigh the drawbacks. However, some days can prove to be difficult when your two year-old is determined to climb on top of your filing cabinet while you're trying to participate in an important conference call. 
Here are ten tips that can help make your life easier, and your little ones happier, while you work at home.
Set up a little desk for your tiny assistant in your home office, close enough for you to keep an eye on him, but far enough away for you to focus on your work.
Tell your child that he is your personal assistant-in-training and emphasize what a big deal it is for him to have this title and his own work area.
Provide your child with some tools similar to those on your desk. Carefully select only the safest items that are virtually indestructible. Your child's active imagination and natural curiosity can easily lead to disaster if he gets his hands on the wrong gadget.
Assign your new assistant with important job responsibilities. Young children love to imitate adults, especially their parents. Depending upon what type of business you operate from home, you can dream up duties that mirror what your child watches you do every day.
One duty that may delight your toddler is opening mail. Give the child junk mail, advertisements or anything else you don't want to read. Provide a little trashcan or place for him to pitch the envelope if that's what you usually do.
Another job that may thrill your child and can potentially occupy him for more than an hour is organizing your out-dated files, old business cards, duplicate copies, rough drafts and any other impertinent papers. The key to this little task is to place files to be organized in a basket or file bin and provide an empty desk drawer or old briefcase for your toddler to transfer the papers to and from - possibly repeatedly. If you can manage to concentrate on your work and coach your new assistant at the same time, you may stimulate their thinking by beginning to count the papers he or she is moving from the basket into the desk drawer.
A must-have for your new little employee is a notepad or notebook similar to the type you use for taking notes, and crayons (if he or she will accept such a "childish" writing implement.) Encourage your child to draw a picture for you and make sure you praise the final product. The more compliments he or she hears from you, the more your child will want to keep creating special drawings for you, or Grandma and Aunt Jeannie and Uncle Timmy etc. Either take a brief time out or make it a routine at the end of the day to hang your child's masterpieces in your office. He will feel like he accomplished something that made you proud. Let your child help you tape his work on the side of your desk or up on the wall. You may be surprised by how intrigued your toddler is with tape!
A chalkboard is an easy, inexpensive addition to your home office that you may never need, but your assistant-in-training will probably use it every day. If you buy the big sidewalk chalk, your toddler will be less likely to decide to taste the bright colored sticks. If he or she does try to take a bite, the chances of choking are reduced with these fat pieces of chalk. Make a production out of adding this new item to your office. Pretend you need it to use it to record your daily business reminders. Your child will be more eager to get his little hands on something he sees you using. One little warning: Although this cheap addition to your office may offer a new outlet for your child's creativity, it will usually lead to the need for a quick bath at the close of the business day!
There are a few items that are actually "toys,'' but may be able to pass for "tools" (similar to the machines you use every day) to be added to your new assistant's desktop. Various toy companies manufacture mini-versions of adult products, like little battery operated computers, designed to teach your child the alphabet or animal sounds; play telephones that ring by themselves and talk back to your child; and musical keyboards that perform tunes automatically and also allow your toddler to make his own melodies. Your toddler may be content to imitate you with toys, like these, that look similar or sound the same as your desktop devices.
Depending upon the location of your office, layout of your house, and your child's level of independence, you may be able to designate duties that require him to leave your office to go find a phone book for you, or to locate that big envelope that came in the mail the other day. You can purposely forget to collect all the items you will need to complete your job that day or you can ask your little assistant to seek out objects that you don't really have to have immediately. Toddlers usually like to look for things, especially when they think they are helping mommy or daddy. Be sure to thank your child and compliment him for being able to find exactly what you wanted!

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