1 "Is it better for a woman to marry a man who loves her than a man she loves. " -- Anonymous
2 "All marriages are happy. It's living together afterwards that is difficult. " -- Anonymous
3 "Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that."-- Anonymous
4 "It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She's not marrying the best man. " -- Anonymous
5 "Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter. " -- Anonymous
6 "Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success."-- Jim Backus
7 "Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long, intricate, intimate dance together and nothing matters more than your own sense of balance and your choice of partner. " -- Amy Bloom
8 "Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery."-- Erma Bombeck
9 "I married the first man I ever kissed. When I tell this to my children they just about throw up. " -- Barbara Bush
10 "All tragedies are finished by a death, all comedies by a marriage."-- Lord Byron
11 "If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam. " -- Johnny Carson
12 "If you are afraid of loneliness, don't marry. " -- Chekhov
13 "Marriage is an adventure, like going to war. " -- G. K. Chesterton
14 "The most happy marriage I can imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. " -- S. T. Coleridge
15 "I never married because I have three pets at home that answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog that growls every morning, a parrot that swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night. "-- Marie Corelli
16 "I'd marry again if I found a man who had 15 million and would sign over half of it to me before the marriage and guarantee he'd be dead within a year. " -- Bette Davis
17 "Marriage is a lottery in which men stake their liberty and women their happiness. " -- Madame de Rieux
18 "Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight."-- Phyllis Diller
19 "There's only one way to have a happy marriage and as soon as I learn what it is I'll get married again."-- Clint Eastwood
20 "Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invaribly they are both disappointed."-- Albert Einstein
21 "A man's wife has more power over him than the state has."-- Ralph Waldo Emerson
22 "Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards. " -- Benjamin Franklin
23 "A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished. " -- Zsa Zsa Gabor
24 "I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house. " -- Zsa Zsa Gabor
25 "I don't think I'll get married again. I'll just find a woman I don't like and give her a house. " -- Lewis Grizzard
26 "If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get married. " -- Katharine Hepburn
27 "Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything else in the house. " -- Jean Kerr
28 "I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. " -- Groucho Marx
29 "Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows, marriage does. " -- Groucho Marx
30 "Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe. " -- Jackie Mason
31 "Marriage is three parts love and seven parts forgiveness of sins. " -- Langdon Mitchell
32 "A good marriage is at least 80 percent good luck in finding the right person at the right time. The rest is trust. " -- Nanette Newman
33 "When marrying, one should ask oneself this question: Do you believe that you will be able to converse well with this woman into your old age? " -- Friedrich Nietzsche
34 "Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you said; after marriage, he'll fall asleep before you finish saying it. " -- Helen Roland
35 "By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher."-- Socrates
36 "Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry. " -- Gloria Steinem
37 "I've yet to be on a campus where most women weren't worrying about some aspect of combining marriage, children, and a career. I've yet to find one where many men were worrying about the same thing. " -- Gloria Steinem
38 "Loves seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century. " -- Mark Twain
39 "Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution. " -- Mae West
40 "Men marry because they are tired; women because they are curious. Both are disappointed." -- Oscar Wilde
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